What do these words mean to you? I ask that question because words dictate our lives as we know it.
I act on these two words when I need to take care of myself on some weekends.
Let me explain why I am using the weekend specifically. I isolate myself from all of my friends when I go to the movies. Which I try to do every Sunday. Usually it is the Metreon movie house on Fourth Street near Mission Street, which is one bus ride from my apartment.
When I want solitude, I go to a park or beach where I know there are specific areas where very few people congregate.
In many situations, we think we need to be doing something all the time or we don’t feel productive. This is not always true in our daily life.
There are times when you don’t even want to be with yourself but you do not have much choice in the matter.
You have created such a long “To Do” list that you are overwhelmed just by reading it. You can drive yourself crazy without any assistance.
The “To Do” can be the beginning of your insanity which you make for the job and home, which also consists of your own personal life. This doesn’t include children, partners, managers, friends and relatives.
If I wrote what I did in month, you would wonder when did I have time to sleep. Trust me, I do take care of me. That is when isolation and solitude are major players in my life.
I want to use these words in a self-help context, which I am sure you never thought to use them in this vein. Well every day is about new learning, right?
I will share one example which might help you rethink the words differently and use them to your advantage. Again, words are powerful.
Let’s start with the “To Do” list on the weekend. I am sure that unless you have a washing machine the first thing on the list is doing the laundry.
After you put the clothes in the machine, do you run out to the store and see if you can get some shopping done before you have to return to put the clothes in the dryer? I have seen that happen many times while I am sitting in the laundry mat leisurely reading or writing my friends on e-mail.
Use this time for you, because whatever you need to do while the clothes are washing will get done. Sit, relax, write or talk to a possible friend in the Laundromat that you don’t know.
Stand or sit outside if the weather permits, take in the air, breathe some breaths, do some stretches, walk a few blocks.
Try and clear your mind. Think about the moment and how grateful you are to have this free time to yourself.
Half of the year is over, so there is still time to change the way in which you find your solace. A place in which to comfort yourself when you feel stress coming on, or to relax and take some “ME” time for yourself. Adventure and comedy movies are my therapy.
Mary “Midgett” is the author of “New York Flavor with a San Francisco beat.”
The San Francisco resident is available to do presentations and seminars on social and family negotiations, and also on parent, self-esteem, social and intimate relationships.
She is on YouTube, titled “Midgett’s hosts of older black women’s issues,” at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Za0eAP4imwY.
For more information, visit www.marymidgett.net/, or drop her a line at Midgettscorner@aol.com.
